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Regarding Tom Daschle speaking out to Bush yesterday...

DASCHLE FINDS BALLS ON SENATE FLOOR



Had Lost Them in Senate Cloakroom



Senate Majority Leader Tom Daschle found his balls on the Senate floor
yesterday, just moments before launching into a stem-winding attack on
President Bush’s alleged politicizing of national security issues, Senate
sources said.



“What are you doing down there?” Senator Daschle said after seeing his
balls on the floor of the Senate well. “I’ve been looking all over for
you!”



Yesterday’s recovery of Senator Daschle’s balls brought down the curtain
on one of the Senate’s longest-running mysteries: what happened to the
Democrats’ balls?



The answer to that riddle, as unbelievable as it may seem, is also
surprisingly simple: the Democrats’ balls have been in the Senate
cloakroom for the last several months, seemingly lost forever.



Charles Hepworth, who runs the cloakroom used by all one hundred senators,
said that the Democrats had checked their balls in the cloakroom months
ago and had forgotten to claim them.



Somehow, Mr. Hepworth said, the Democratic balls became lost in a tangled
mess of other unclaimed items.



“It’s really a disaster area in that cloakroom,” Mr. Hepworth said. “The
Republicans lost their economic plan in there months ago and they still
can’t find it.”



Yesterday, though, was a time of celebration for the Democrats, who were
unanimously jubilant to be reunited with their long-lost balls.



“I’ve got to tell you, it feels great,” said Sen. Diane Feinstein (D-CA).
[via: borowitz report]