Sunday, July 28, 2002
BUSH PRAISES MINERS, RESCUERS FOR TAKING PEOPLE’S MINDS OFF STOCK MARKET
Kept Wall Street Mess On Back Burner For 72 Hours, President Says
As the nine miners trapped underground in western Pennsylvania emerged to
the cheers of a grateful nation, President Bush praised the miners and
their rescuers for keeping the public’s mind off the plummeting stock
market for 72 hours.
“Thanks to you, Americans were distracted from the disaster on Wall Street
for the better part of three days,” President Bush said today. “For that,
you have my heartfelt thanks.”
President Bush added that as the tense rescue drama unfolded, the American
people “were distracted from the accounting scandals at Enron and Tyco,
not to mention the controversy swirling around my insider investment in
the Harken Energy Corp.”
“Oops,” the President added.
Across the country, ordinary citizens joined in praising the media
attention given the rescue drama, with many saying they were grateful that
it briefly bumped conservative author Ann Coulter off the cable news
networks.
[via: www.Borowitzreport.com]
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